Monday, July 5, 2010

Taking My Time


I was debating if I even wanted to this blog entry. But I decided to do it anyway. As many of you may or may not know, I was in a almost 2 year relationship that ended about a month, and a half ago. And lately I've been going through the motions, and so on. But this blog entry is not so much about my breakup, it's about how I'm starting to feel about guys latching on to me so fast afterwards. Like I don't mind going out here, and there, hanging with folks or whatever, but what's becoming very irritating is people, not giving me my space or room to breathe. It's like as soon as I was listed as single, things started getting out of hand and crazy! I mean people getting mad because I don't reply to them as promptly, as they think I should. Or they think I'm stuck up because I won't go out with them, and so on. And I'm like, what part of me just breaking up with someone folks just don't get! Right now I can't even imagine jumping into another relationship with anyone! I really want to take time to myself. I want to heal, and get to a place where I'm ready to move forward. Plus I hate men right now, so it's not a great time to try to wine & dine me lmao. I'm totally enjoying my space, and I don't want it invaded with fake promises, lies, and fantasies of how I'm the one for you. It's going to be a LONG while before Deonte` sees himself with anyone. I'm going to focus more on my career, and other important things in my life now. If love finds me in the middle of all that, then fine. But it will take a powerful man to make me think about ever falling in love again. And what I mean by that is, he would truly have to pierce through this bulletproof coating surrounding my heart. I just need some Me time, and as of now, I'm shut down for repairs. 

20 comments:

Jeff0418 said...

You know I get where your coming from D, and your making the right decision you have to make sure you mind and heart are good to go before jumping back into something. For the life of me I will never understand why people just dont get that!! Its like damn can I just get a minute to process things before you vultures start attacking..but I know you will be all good and if you have any problem with pests that just cant take a hint you let me know..you know ill come up there and put them back in their lane very quickly...all in that order, LOL

Reggie said...

You know what I liked about this? It was honest. Breakups are hard and they suck, bad. I know because I had a horrid public breakup last year and blogging weas almost impossible. I found that taking time to myself helps. And D, you gotta do you.

And you know how crazy these gays are. They are on a hunt for dick and ass and you have both. They are going to see you as prey and well, those lions are hungry as hell.

You keep doing you, buddy. Listen to me go on like I'm Oprah!

I got you back like Keri Hilson!

-R

deonte' k said...

Jeff: LMAO LOL..... thanks homie!!!

Reggie: Awwww homie thanks ,and that means alot to me. And lmao @ "hey are on a hunt for dick and ass and you have both" lol... ;)

LudaKhris said...

I mean you can't blame folks your a nice guy and were few and far between....so their just pressed to know folks like you still exist.

However with that being said...I totally feel you. If you don't like the attention your getting than be upfront with these guys so that they don't keep getting on your nerves and in the way of your growth and progress as a man.

Keep your head up man...you know where I be if you need me.

deonte' k said...

LudaKhris: Awww thanks homie... and if there's anything about me that u know, u know I'm straight upfront with folks all the time lol.... I appreciate ur comment! U know ur my lil' homie ;)

Sir-Yellow-Bone? said...

One day at at time my friend... Nobody can tell you how to feel in this situation. You'll be ready when Deonte is ready. I was like you three months ago...

Nigel said...

Deonte,

Take as much time as you feel necessary. I can understand how you feel having broken up some months ago and just not in the mood to share close space with anyone anytime soon. Not only do you need time to heal but also to focus on things that you may have sacrificed during the course of your relationship.
The 'time out' that you are taking just may be vital to your future.

Much love

deonte' k said...

Sir-Yellow-Bone?: Thanks alot homie.... means alot to me... Hope ur better now, and I will get there soon! ;)

Gummi Bare said...

*big hugs*

Mr. FreeXone said...

Remember, time doesn't heal, its what you do during that time which makes you heal. :-) love ya

deonte' k said...

Sir-Yellow-Bone?: Thanks alot homie.... means alot to me... Hope ur better now, and I will get there soon! ;)

deonte' k said...

The following comments were left on this comment section, but somehow didn't post. I received them in a email, so I decided to post them.

Nigel: Deonte,

Take as much time as you feel necessary. I can understand how you feel having broken up some months ago and just not in the mood to share close space with anyone anytime soon. Not only do you need time to heal but also to focus on things that you may have sacrificed during the course of your relationship.
The 'time out' that you are taking just may be vital to your future.

Much love

Gummi Bare: *big hugs*

Mr. FreeXone: Remember, time doesn't heal, its what you do during that time which makes you heal. :-) love ya

Thanks guys for these comments, not sure why they didn't post!

deonte' k said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
deonte' k said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Deonte said...

Sir-Yellow-Bone?: Thanks alot homie.... means alot to me... Hope ur better now, and I will get there soon! ;)

Deonte said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
deonte' k said...

Gummi Bare: hugs back to ya! ;)

Mr. FreeXone: Awwww thanks boo!!! ;)

BuddahDesmond said...

Yes! One of the reasons why I was attracted to your blog was because of its honesty. And you cannot get anymore honest, real, or frank than this. Well, you can actually...LOL!

But Deonte, take all the time that you need to find that place, to get into a space that supports what you need most right now. Break ups can do a number on us. And it's important that we do the work necessary for us to heal. To take note of the lessons we've learned. Take it all in stride because it makes us that much stronger. And besides, we don't want to bring that baggage into other facets of our personal and professional lives... Cause that really messes shit up.

We got mad love and respect for you sharing this. Thank you so much for simply being you and telling it like it is. One thing's for sure - everybody better watch out when the "Shut Down For Repairs" is removed. You're BAD now, but you will be REAL BAD MUTHA (shut your mouth) then...LMAO!

speaking hypothetically said...

Well Dang! its all been said in here oh well dont let bois stress ya take time and figure you out and you'll be just fine ...ENJOY BEING SINGLE FOR AWHILE(atleast the summer months joking)

Acoustic Soul said...

Get over it! *hugs*

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