Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Either way.......

.....he's still my little brother!!!!!!

Yesterday I reacted towards something my brother did to me on my Facebook page. I feel as though I reacted out of anger and rage, because of the type of things he said to me. My blog to me is very therapeutic. Every since 2005 (when I was a blogger on yahoo 360) I've vented, and expressed my feelings how I wanted. But what I didn't think about this time or realize, is my audience has truly expanded. So when I wrote my blog entry about disowning my brother, it was straight up out of anger, and being upset at how he feels about who I am. I still feel he was wrong, but I also feel so was I, in the way I handled it. I will take responsibility for my actions. I didn't do the blog to embarrass him in no type of way. If anything I embarrassed myself. And the reason I say that is, I do love my brother. I care for him a lot. He means a lot to me. I wished we had a better relationship. He will probably never understand how it is to be something you didn't choose to be. And to also be something he ultimately hates. All I know is he is my brother, and I will never give up on him. Yes he needs to learn how to respect me, as well as my public sites, and not be so vulgar towards things he don't get or understand. But when he's ready to talk to me he will know where to find me. Maybe one day we can get back to how we used to be in this photo. If not, the one thing he can't ever change is I'm his older GAY brother. Accept it and deal with it or don't. Either way I still love him the same, no matter what I said yesterday. Goodnite!

10 comments:

AJ said...

I'm glad you're letting go of the anger and not holding a grudge. As someone said before, sometimes it's better to love from afar. If he refuses to accept all of who you are then it's his loss, not yours. You shouldn't have to stress yourself over. You just go on and live your life. Let it be up to him to come around to accepting you and dealing with it.

speaking hypothetically said...

Awww you totally took the High Road Buddy and yes he's young with age comes maturity...BTW very cute pic!

corvedacosta said...

This is all a journey. You are far ahead along yours. I dunno how my family would react-maybe worse than your bro.

Hope he comes around.

Jeff0418 said...

Now this is what a real grown up man is made up of. Knowing that you have fault and admitting to it is always a good sign of a good person. I do totally agree with you and hopefully one day your brother will see his fault in the situation as well and you and he can have a nice civil conversation and hash things out...

Nate said...

First and for most I will always love my brother. I think I was more angry that I had to find all of this out threw facebook and you didn't feel that you could come and tell me this on your own and give me the chance to accept it. This is not the 1st case like this that we had to deal with in our family and I still have a relationship with those family members, so do I hate gays...no.. I can accept you for who you are but I think we both agree that people say and do things that can be hurtful when there angry. So I hope this is another situation that we can get pass and I'm hoping there is no hard feelings against Deshelle because she's very curious of why she loss you as a friend on facebook. Do I understand how it is or feel to be gay?...no.. and don't think I ever care to but that's just me as a person..would I rather have 2 brothers one gay and one straight rather than to just have one ofcource I want both of my brothers I just hope after all of this next time you can come to me man to man and tell me something like this.

Denisha said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Denisha said...

That's right!You guys both have good points. I'm glad that you both can see eye to eye and be able to express your feelings towards eachother. As a Family we all came a long way and I feel that our love for eachother should always remain stong. I love you guys as if y'all was my brothers. I wish that we all could have a better relationship even though our schedules won't allow it, but that don't change the fact that we are a family. We only have ONE life to live & let's make the best of it!

Mr. Deonte K' (I don't want to put your government name out there) I will be in DC in April. I want to do a special photo shoot with u. I will give you the details on it when we talk later today babe.

Nigel said...

I only hope that it gets better between you two. I am a firm believer in family. All the best in forming a stronger relationship. God Bless Deonte.

THEGAYTEKEEPER said...

LOVE is ALWAYS the answer. Your brother will come around sooner or later, until then keep sending positive energy his way...

Acoustic Soul said...

I know exactly what you're doing. I know I've done and said things that I've regretted, but just as you said, thru thick and thin, no matter what you two are brothers.

I believe he will come around. just because you are something he doesn't understand doesn't change the person you are. he'll come around.

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